This summer, a Campbellford nurse is releasing a raw, unfiltered memoir about her mental health journey and recovery with the hope of helping others to not feel so alone.
“My goal is to inspire others who are struggling but also to bring awareness, in both personal and professional lives, that we can’t judge people for some of the decisions that they make,” says Emma Rogers. “There may be more reasons behind why people act the way they do.”
To be published on July 26, Darkness Before Light explores Rogers’ experiences with bipolar disorder, ADHD, self-destruction, and addiction while growing up in Peterborough and her journey to survival and recovery.
“My parents would call me a child who definitely struggled, who was very unhappy, who had outbursts from a young age, and no matter what my family did to provide me happiness, I just really struggled to internally find that,” she says. “Because we live in a society that really has stigma around mental health, we didn’t seek attention right away and so we let that mental health hide for a lot of my life and, because I was under-treated, it led to a lot of problems.”
The memoir explores some of Rogers’ “darkest” moments, including impulsive, risky, and suicidal behaviours.
“For those who are suffering from mental health, you really have to hit your dark place to realize that you can’t let mental health dictate who you are as a person, and you have to own it, grow and learn, and develop strategies to overcome the demons that are inside,” Rogers says. “The light is living freely and living in the moment and loving yourself, and that’s where I’ve been able to get to.”
The memoir outlines some of these obstacles Rogers faced and her experiences on the path to recovery, including being admitted into a Toronto mental health facility in 2023. It was on this “stepping stone” where she began finding healing through journalling and writing.
“It’s a new discovery and something that I wished I utilized way, way back,” she recalls, referring to journalling. “I started writing for myself, and when I started reading back on things, it really hit me that I wish when I was younger, I had someone I could look up to who was going through the same struggle and me.”
“As I was writing, I really was inspired to help others, and I hope that more people come forward after this memoir is released just to bring awareness and gather as a community to conquer this stigma that surrounds mental health.”
As a registered nurse working in long-term care who has been in several leadership roles throughout her career, Rogers explains it was also important for her to highlight, through the memoir, how invisible mental illness can be.
“You can have what appears to be the most perfect life and people on the outside can think all is well, but you can have so many internal struggles, so when we’re communicating with people, we really need to be open to that and know that people have lives and people have struggles,” she says. “There are so many times where I’ve made decisions both in my personal (life) and professional careers that have been a result of my mental health struggles, where I’ve acted out in ways, and I’ve been so judged for it.”
To further break down the stigma, Rogers is hosting “Mental Health, Let’s Walk” on Saturday, July 19 at 11 a.m. at Jackson Park in Peterborough. She is inviting community members who needs a friend or companion to talk about some of their challenges and struggles while walking together as a community.
To RSVP for the walk, visit www.breakingthestigma.ca/event-details/mental-health-lets-walk.
The walk is one event in a series of initiatives Rogers is beginning to launch through her new platform, Breaking The Stigma.
“If I can be a voice for others coming forward, not only can we reduce the stigma, but we can also change the way workplaces are against mental health and change the healthcare system,” she says. “I’ve had several people reach out via messenger or social media and say they’re struggling right now and just don’t have the access to mental health services.”
When Rogers was in the mental health facility, she was fortunate to have her parents support her financially, but she recognizes that not everybody has that support.
“There are people who have reached out who are on waiting lists, and they’ve been on waiting lists for two years to get the treatment they need,” she says. “Healthcare in and of itself needs to improve when it comes to mental health, because mental health is no different than any other illness and it really needs to be taken seriously. I think the more people that can come forward and share their stories and advocate, the more we can improve the way of the world.”
Through Breaking the Stigma, Rogers is also using her lived experience to lead writing workshops on writing through pain, with a large focus on reflection.
“The workshops will just focus on really digging into yourself and trying to find self-love and self-reflection,” she says. “I don’t think people self-reflect enough, and I think self-reflection has been a huge part of my healing and recovery.”
Rogers is also available for speaking engagements to share about her experiences, her recovery, and the tools and resources she used. Above all, she hopes to create a community where people feel supported enough to come forward and talk about their challenges.
“My goal is to share my story, share my struggles, share my strengths, and really develop a community and develop a space where people can feel safe and heard,” she says. “That’s the goal: bring awareness and be a support for those who are struggling.”
For more information, visit www.breakingthestigma.ca or follow Rogers on Instagram and Facebook.
